I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
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