i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Are we still banned from the library?
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
