gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Randomize
