I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Randomize
