Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
