my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
