after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Who put my cat in the fridge?
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
