i already hear my dad disowning me
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
