i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
