Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
is it fun? or sober?
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
