when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Randomize
