3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
