HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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