Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
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