Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
