It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
