Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Randomize
