Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Randomize
