I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Randomize
