you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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