i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Randomize
