I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Randomize
