I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Randomize
