$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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