i think my tv is drunk
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
