So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
vagina is talking i cant
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
