I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
