I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
