Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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