I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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