He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
