I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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