Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
