I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Sext me about skeletons
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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