Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
