so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize