i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
This house was built for laser tag.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
