This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Randomize