Soap is not a condiment
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
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