i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Randomize