Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Randomize
