she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
