im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
