I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
