About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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