this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
she peed on how many people?
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
