Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
My feet surprised me
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
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