The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
