question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
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