Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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